Here are some of the latest rumors going around about the Oakland A's.

Wait.

Sorry.

Here is the latest in trade scenarios that have been verified by at least two sources.

If a discussion took place on all of the rumors going around at some point the A's would have Randy Johnson, Barry Bonds and Albert Pujols for Mike Oquist and a dirty paper towel to be wiped later, or they would have nobody left after BIlly Beane traded the whole franchise away.

Anyway, the confirmed discussion.

PLACIDO PLANCO FOR RICARDO RINCON -

The sticking point, accordig to two ESPN.com sources has been how much of Polanco's remaining salary the Phillies would assume. Quick look at Ploanco's numbers:

PLACIDO PLOANCO (2004 Salary $3.95 Million)

Year	Team	Lg.	Age	Org.	Level	Avg	SLG	OBP	OPS	G	AB	R	H	2B	3B	HR	RBI	SB	CS	BB	SO
1994	Ariz Cardinals	Ariz	18	Stl	Rookie	.213	.268			32	127	17	27	4	0	1	10	4		7	15
1995	Peoria	Midw	19	Stl	A	.266	.324			103	361	43	96	7	4	2	41	7		18	30
1996	St. Petersburg	FSL	20	Stl	A	.291	.363			137	540	65	157	29	5	0	51	4		24	34
1997	Arkansas	Tex	21	Stl	AA	.291	.346			129	508	71	148	16	3	2	51	19		29	51
1998	Memphis	PCL	22	Stl	AAA	.280	.378			70	246	36	69	19	1	1	21	6		16	15
1998	St. Louis	NL	22	Stl	MLB	.254	.342	.292	.634	45	114	10	29	3	2	1	11	2	0	5	9
1999	Memphis	PCL	23	Stl	AAA	.275	.325			29	120	18	33	4	1	0	10	2		3	11
1999	St. Louis	NL	23	Stl	MLB	.277	.359	.321	.680	88	220	24	61	9	3	1	19	1	3	15	24
2000	St. Louis	NL	24	Stl	MLB	.316	.418	.347	.765	118	323	50	102	12	3	5	39	4	4	16	26
2002	St. Louis	NL	26	Stl	MLB	.284	.389	.316	.705	94	342	47	97	19	1	5	27	3	1	12	27
2002	Phillies	NL	26	Phi	MLB	.296	.427	.353	.780	53	206	28	61	13	1	4	22	2	2	14	14
2003	Phillies	NL	27	Phi	MLB	.289	.447	.352	.799	122	492	87	142	30	3	14	63	14	2	42	38
2004	Phillies	NL	28	Phi	MLB	.262	.348	.322	.670	70	279	37	73	9	0	5	18	4	2	18	23
MLB Totals:		5 years				.291	.396	.336	.732	520	1697	246	492	86	13	30	181	26	12	104	138
Minor League Totals:		6 years				.279	.344			500	1902	250	530	79	14	6	184	42	0	97	156

Yah. This deal is not going to happen. At least not with the current players involved. Which is another way of saying this deal is not going to be done.

Why would the A's trade for a middle infielder who has NEVER had higher than a .355 On Base Percentage in
MLB (and didn't have a robust OBP in the minors) who gets paid $3.95 million a year? Did the A's suddenly get a longing for Terrence Long in 2nd baseman form? Because that's who Placido Polanco is.

Terrence Long.

The only way this deal makes sense is if the A's were hoping that Arthur Rhodes was substituted for Ricardo Rincon's name along the negotiation trail and they were absolved of his $3.07 Million in 2005 and 2006.

Rincon has some value. More than Placido Polanco. You would think the A's could get Frank Catalanatto from J.P. Ricciardi for cheap - or even Alex Cora if Paul DePodesta wanted to roll the dice.

So, let's put this deal to bed. It's not going to happen, as is.

...

And that's about all there is of confirmed discussions. There have been other rumors about a three-team trade with San Diego and Boston involving Derek Lowe, Brian Lawrence and Jermaine Dye - not very credible. There was also the Houston connection, again, Arthur Rhodes for washout Brandon Duckworth; an expensive wet sack of mice for a once decent pitcher and/or younger wet sack of mice. There was also a rumor involving Doug Mientkiewicz - yes, the A's need MORE 1st basemen.

If anyone has been following the A's for the last, oh, 25 years or so, they know 95% of the deals that are talked about never were talked about. And of that 5%, they weren't discussed as they were filtered out to the general public.

Billy Beane works fast and he gets the A's nose into a lot of other team's business. Usually when a trade goes down, it never leaves the Front Office - Paul, J.P. or David Forst. President Michael Crowley sometimes gets involved if there are money issues, but even then, names are not important. There are no runners siphoning information off, no mail room clerks steaming open envelopes, no butter-rummed up ginny secretaries shooting off with the reporters down at 'Jimmy's One More Time'...it's just Billy, at his best. In his office sitting around in shorts, a T-Shirt and a telephone stuck to his head.

The trading deadline is what it is. Some teams can make a move and other can go search their future. The arch of procedure the last week of July is so slanted that all telecommunications run through Oakland Coliseum's Executive offices. Billy completely moves the competition through him even as they attempt to gravitate away from him.

From Opening Day to June the Oakland A's season is on cruise control. The rest is what he makes of it. Even if no deal is made, you know he made enough noise, enough smoke to force the other tribes into hiding or the purely desperate shriek.

It will all be over in a few hours.

And then we can start looking forward to the waiver deals and the September call-ups.

Oh, and if the As are in first place in the AL West on 1 August 2004 - all is right with the world.